don't know why
Sometimes I just don't have a fucking clue what God is doing. I'm fine, but a friend of mine is in a lot of pain right now, pain that seems like it could have very simply been avoided.
After the heartache and trials of TTC, she finally became pregnant on a last-shot IVF. She's been so thrilled all week. We all celebrated with her. I prayed for this so hard and so long for her, and it was pure joy to see that she made it. But yesterday, her beta was 13 and today the digital test says "not pregnant."
It just seems cruel to me. Why even let her have what she wanted for so long, just to take it away? What possible good can come of this? So what if now she knows she and her husband can get pregnant - she now has to deal with the loss of m/c on top of the pain of TTC, and coming to the end of her options, and feeling like she's running out of time. I still believe she can have a happy ending to this horrible journey of hers, but now she has one more wound to overcome.
I sure hope God knows what He's doing. Because I don't have a fucking clue.
posted by joyous melancholy at 1:51 PM
2 Comments:
I can't believe what she's going through either. I had tears in my eyes when I saw her post yesterday. It really isn't fair.
This whole TTC & pregnancy thing is just one big crap shoot. There's no rhyme or reason to any of it. It's a bit discouraging really.
And there's absolutely nothing anyone can say to give comfort to anyone else. "Cheer up?" Right. "Hang in there!" Don't wanna. "Just trust God." Yeah. That's helpful. If it has to hurt so much for so many people, there should at least be a way to comfort them. But the only real comfort comes with the end of the journey. Then a whole new set of issues pops up.
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