that bitch
*** POSSIBLE TMI ALERT ***
I have no idea what the hell is going on. Last night I peed, wiped, and *bam* AF was there. Not spotting, not over reacting, full blood. I cried my eyes out. I used to think that was just an expression, but my eyes are all buggy today, puffy and swollen and red, I cried so hard. Body-wracking, tears won't stop, "God must hate me and I'm letting everyone down and I can't do this anymore" crying. I told DH "I can't even look at you, I'm so ashamed of my infertility." Which made him cry. Which made me cry even harder. Which I didn't even think was possible.
Today? Not a drop of red. CM is white and creamy again.
So of course I tested. BFN. It's 13DO (12DPIUI). I've never made it to 13DPO before. Usually my LP is 10-11 days, 11 being "late" for me.
I swear, this is just cruel at this point. AF is just fucking with me now.
At least I'm not crying anymore. At this point, I'm just pissed.
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