we made a baby!

So much for induction. My water broke at 8am on Monday July 1. I have a huge long birth story, but the short version is it went well. I labored naturally for several hours until the back labor became too much and my blood pressure got too high. Then I agreed to an epidural and was immediately set afloat on a cloud of bliss. Got about 5 hours of sleep, woke in the morning at 10cm dilated and ready to push. But then my contractions started getting weaker and further apart, so I agreed to pitocin to get them going again. Twenty minutes of pushing, and Baby G was born.

We had a severe bout of jaundice that necessitated him returning to the hospital after one night at home. Four days under the UV lights in the NICU brought him back from a deep yellow to a proper baby color. It was so difficult to have to bring him back, to have to leave him there, to not be able to hold him except for when we fed him. But he's home now, back in my arms where he belongs.

I think he's just about the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. I can not even describe the wonder of seeing his face for the first time. I recognized him the moment I saw him, as if I'd been waiting for him to come to us. He's all ours, our very own baby head to smell, all the noises and faces he makes just for us. Being a mother is both the hardest and most wonderful thing I have ever done in my life. There's no way to prepare for this. I'm in heaven.