whine

I wasn't going to, but I think I need a good whine.

I have a headache. I went on the Roger Rabbit ride at D-land a couple of weeks ago, and the strobe light set off a migraine that hasn't completely disappated yet. I hate having headaches, they just feel so crippling to me. I can't do anything right when my head hurts! Talking is an effort, keeping my eyes open is hard, relating to people and paying attention to what they're saying is next to impossible. I've already taken all the Imitrex I'm supposed to, and I might cave and take a Fiornal, which I'm NOT supposed to, but it works and I have some left over and my head hurts!!!

On top of that, I dropped a glass spice bottle of chili powder on my big toe, and it's all bruisey and sore.

My hair won't do what I want it to do. It started getting curly this year, when I cut most of it off. Which was great - until I had it cut for the curls and then realized that it was the Clomid that was making it curly, and I'm not taking it anymore, so now I just look shaggy. I don't have another hair appt until next month, and really there's nothing that can be done to it right now because of how it's cut.

I made the mistake of going shopping when I had the munchies, so the only food I have in the house is chips and dip and popcorn and cookies. And I'm hungry, but I kind of feel like I should want something healthy, but I'll probably cave and have the chips and dip. I haven't gotten back on my South Beach Diet, even though I've been saying I'm going to since Christmas, and when I'm actually on it I feel better and actually enjoy it. It's the getting started part that's hard for me.

I hate my job. I work with an idiot, and two bosses who won't get rid of him even though he's toxic. And they give me every reason to feel like it's my fault things are hard there right now, that I'm the one who's the bad guy, even though I'm not the one doing anything wrong. I'm just the kid shouting "Hey, the Emperor ain't got no clothes on!" And they want to be mad at me, instead of the stupid naked guy who fleeced everyone.

I think I need to start going back to Church. Church people tend to piss me off, though. And I hate looking for a new place, and I don't want to give up my Sunday mornings. Because I REALLY love to sleep in. But I'm actually starting to miss it, and I think it might be good for me and DH to find a place we both like.

Oh, and I want a baby so much it huts. My arms ache to hold my child. My heart yearns to have an object for all of this love that's already spilling over.

I wonder if it's time to move up north. DH wants to live there, I'm looking for a new job, he'll probably want to find a new job once he graduates... Maybe it's time to make the break?

Oh, and my damn head won't stop hurting.