waiting

Today is my first beta ever. No HPT for me, no sir. They're doing it old-school, drawing blood and calling me with the results. Not only has baby-making become a team sport, so has the big reveal. I will not be the first to know. First the lab tech, then the doctor I imagine, then the nurse who calls me. Then me and DH, and the news spreads from there. BFF, E--, a post and some emails, family…

It's 9am and we just got back.  DH came with me (I didn't think he would) and he's working from home today (I asked him to).  My plan was to get up early, throw on some clothes, get there and back and hop back into bed.  It took us almost an hour to get there - the drive is usually 20 minutes.  So now it's 9 and I'm so nervous my stomach hurts, and there's no way I can sleep.

They said to call them after 2 if I haven't heard from them by then.  So much for a two hour wait.  I'm hoping they'll call early. A friend of mine said she always got the call around noon.

One of the nurses called me on my way there to ask if I was taking Follistim or Clomid next cycle.  I was a bit confused - I hadn't even had my blood drawn yet, and they were telling me it failed?!  I told her I was never under any circumstances ever taking Clomid again, and she hung up.  I was crushed.  They had so little faith in me and this cycle, they were already planning for the next one.  Couldn't they at least *pretend* until I got my test results back?

Then she called back, said she'd called me in error and meant to call someone else.  I told her I was on my way in, so it seemed strange, and she was very apologetic.

So of course when I got there I said hello to all the nurses, then wagged my finger at the one who'd called and said "Don't DO that to me!  No mistakes when you call me back later today!  And I want GOOD NEWS!" 

So that's about it.  The nurse taking my blood asked which vein she should use (they're tiny, so they always ask me how others have done it), and I told her "use the pregnant vein."  She didn't get it, said "Well, I need one with blood in it."  "Yes," I told her, "pregnant blood."  At least she smiled at that.  I use humor as a shield (I know, you're shocked, but it's true), so it's comforting when people around me are light hearted during a nerve-wracking situation.

And now I wait.  Anywhere from 2-5 hours. It is going to be a very long day.